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Anxious Attachment and Your Nervous System

Updated: Mar 10

Anxious attachment isn't just a typical bond between two people—it's more complex, and often not so healthy. It's all about fearing rejection and feeling abandoned, and it messes with your trust.


This type of attachment can really mess with your nervous system, causing real havoc.

It usually starts in childhood and can make you overly clingy or dependent in relationships. You end up feeling insecure, doubting yourself, and finding it hard to trust others. And guess what? These feelings can show up physically too, messing with your body.


Anxious attachment means you're always seeking closeness and intimacy, but it does a number on your nervous system. It amps up your anxiety, makes you feel insecure, and keeps you on high alert, worrying if your partner is really there for you or not.


This constant tension is like a slow burn on your nerves, making it hard to relax, sleep, or feel secure in any relationship. And it doesn't stop there—it messes with your decision-making, clarity of thought, and how you handle emotions. It's like a vicious cycle, with fear leading to physical symptoms like headaches or stomach issues.


But here's the thing: you're not stuck with this forever. With some awareness and support, you can break free from these patterns. Just because you feel anxious doesn't mean your relationship is bad—it might just be time to pause and reflect.


Remember, this attachment style doesn't define you, and there are ways to deal with it. The first step is recognizing when it's happening and taking action to manage it.


Here are 4 ways to cope with anxious attachment:

1: Establishing and maintaining boundaries

Be clear about what's okay and what's not, and communicate it openly.

2: Working on self-awareness and mindfulness

Get in tune with your feelings and learn to regulate.


3: Creating safe spaces for vulnerability

Create safe spaces where you can express yourself authentically.

4: Seek out for support

You don't have to do this alone. Research shows that true healing happens with the support of a compassionate witness.



By taking the time to learn more about yourself and how anxious attachment affects you, you can begin to create healthier relationships and cope better with your struggles. With practice, it is completely possible to lessen the negative impact of anxious attachment on your nervous system and live a happier life.


If you're looking to:

  • Improve your communication skills in your personal relationships

  • Learn more about the connection between the nervous system and communication patterns

  • Explore how your attachment style plays a role in your relationships

  • Seeking more positive and fulfilling relationships

CLICK HERE to join the waitlist for my course RECONNECT


During this course you will learn:

  • How the nervous system affects communication patterns in relationships so that you can calmly manage conflict

  • Tools for recognizing triggers so that you can express your needs and feel understood

  • An increased sense of self awareness so that you don’t feel like you have to hold everything your feeling inside

  • Techniques to help you address the queues that your body is sending you so that you can trust your instincts and feel settled in the uncertainty of the outcome


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